[00:00:01] Speaker A: Thanks for tuning in to the Met Church podcast. Here at the Met, we are all about connecting people to God and one another. If you have any questions or want more information about what's happening here at the church, then head to our
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[00:00:25] Speaker B: Well, good morning, everybody. I'm glad you are here. It's great to see all of you this morning had some great news I wanted to open with. Did you know yesterday in our CRC we had 128 volunteers who served a record number 923 families. Isn't that incredible? Yes. So give them a big hand.
And now keep in mind that's families that's on an average, family out here is about three to five people. So you do the math, and you can see how many people that we were able to help get through a difficult week. And so we're so excited about that. Thank you for your support, and I appreciate it so much. When God created everything, and I do believe in the Genesis account of creation, I could summarize it this way. God one day stepped from nowhere. He stood on nothing. He spoke everything into creation, and it stays there because he tells it to. That's my understanding of creation. And I'm just suggesting you that he created three institutions in the Bible. The first institution was the Home. The second institution that he created was government. And the third institution he created was the church. And these three institutions are integral to the success and to the well being of all mankind. And I honestly believe that the most essential of those three institutions will be the home. As the home goes, so goes the church. As a church goes, so goes a community. As a community goes, so goes a nation. So the home is fundamental. It is foundational. Again, it's the very first thing that God created. And so I say that because it should not surprise any of us that this institution called the Home is under attack today. It's under assault. There are no little homes on the prairie represented in the room here this morning. Before Cindy went to heaven, she and I were married for 42 years, and she would echo from heaven. It was not perfect. There's no perfect marriages. There are no perfect homes. We all do the best that we can with the time we've been given to do better and to be better. That's why in a service like this, we can find principles from God's word that we could apply that hopefully make us have better, stronger, healthier homes. But homes are under attack. The family is under assault. And this morning I want to talk about the most sensual element of your family, and that is your marriage, how important it is for you and that partner that you love so much to make it work and to be able to have a healthy home. I was out in the lobby one weekend between service. This little girl ran up to me, she's out of breath and she said I said, what's wrong? She goes, this little boy keeps chasing me. I can't get him to stop chasing me. He's just chasing me from one end to the other. I said, well honey, you know how to get him to stop chasing us. She said how? I said stop running.
He won't know what to do with you if he catches you now. Soon we call that dating and then ultimately we call that marriage.
That we're not sure what to do with you once we catch you.
But that's why we are learning together how to be more effective and to be better. But can I tell you that all of us together, all of us together are designed for relationship.
Now, I know the tendency when you've been broken and your heart has been crushed, when you've gone through a broken relationship, the tendency we all have is to withdraw, to insulate and isolate. To say that old saying, burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on me. And so sometimes you get burned by a guy and you just say, all guys are horrible. You burned by a woman, all women are terrible. You go through it, but you have a bad marriage. You say, I'm just never going to get married again. And sometimes we really do. We go to that extreme level thinking that we somehow can protect our heart by insulating and isolating.
But the Bible teaches a principle in Romans 14 seven, listen to this none of us lives to themselves alone. None of us die to themselves alone. God designed us to be relational.
We need people, we need each other. We learn from one another, we're comforted by one another, we're encouraged by one another. And yeah, there's going to be some duds in the mix, but you're going to have that. Every deck of cards has a joker.
You're going to have people in your life that won't be true. There are people in your life that will betray you. Remember Jesus had twelve. One of them betrayed him.
But that doesn't mean you give up on the idea of not having a relationship and you give up on the idea of not thinking your relationship can be better.
Someone once said that to protect one's heart there's a tendency to put your heart within a concrete vault and to bury your heart deep within the earth. And the thinking is, if my heart is sealed away from all other people, that nothing can get to it and that my heart can never be broken again.
But he went on to conclude his thought by saying that once the heart is in that concrete container buried within the earth that it isn't just a matter of time until one's heart begins to take on the characteristics of its surroundings.
That your heart can become cold and your heart can become hard and your heart can become dark.
So I understand it's difficult. And for a period of time, can I tell you, you may need to insulate and isolate.
You may need to go into emotional ICU.
There may need to be a time when you distance yourself from other people and you disassociate yourself from your life while you heal. We have nurses and medical professionals and doctors in our church who would tell you that the ICU is necessary, but you don't go there to stay there.
The objective of everyone working on that floor is to get you out of there, to get you functioning in your life again. My goal and my objective is to help you when you're hurting, but to get you up and get you functioning again.
So you may need to go there.
You may need to insulate and isolate, and there may be a period of time in your life when you just don't need to do people and you just don't need to be around a lot of people. I get that. Been there.
But you can't stay there, because if you go there and you stay there, it will eventually change you.
So you need to be healthy, and you need to reengage. And at some point, you shake yourself, and sometimes you have to talk to somebody to help you do that.
There's no shame in talking to somebody.
Proverbs says there's man, there's wisdom and there's health and a multitude of counselors. We have psychologists in our church. I talked to one one time, and he said to me, he said, Bill, if you can get someone to talk about what they think about, most of them will not believe what they just heard themselves say.
Your thoughts take on a life of their own.
Have you ever thought about why they put prisoners in solitary confinement?
Because one of the most dangerous places you can be, one of the most destructive places you could be, is left alone with your thoughts.
You can torment yourself, and you can't get outside of yourself. And so sometimes it's good just to say, I need help.
I'm in a place, a dark place. I need to find my way back. I need to get healthy again. And so I understand what put you there, but you have steps to get you out of there, and we'll help you, because God designed us, guys. He designed us for relationships. And again, one of the most significant relationships is marriage.
I do a lot of weddings, and I often like to joke with these young couples. I tell them, hey, guess what? Marriage is the end of your trouble, but it's the front end.
You're going to work through a lot of stuff, and truly, most marriages see if you'll agree with me on this guys if you've been married for a minute. Most marriages start out as an ideal.
They soon become an ordeal.
And it isn't long you'll start looking for a New Deal.
Is that about it? It's a cycle. So I want to try to catch you somewhere between the ideal and the ordeal before you look for the new deal. Because I can tell you something you need to bring a healthy you into any relationship you go into. Remember that Jerry Maguire movie Cindy made me watch? It not enough shooting in that thing to keep me interested. You know what this is? Free. You know what would help most romantic movies? If ladies, if whoever makes them to keep the men engaged just shoot a gun up in the air every now and then to wreck a car. We need a car chase. We're totally back in the movie, right, fellas? If we can just have a little more excitement. But anyway, I digress Jerry Maguire. That's where I was going. You remember the line from Jerry Maguire? Some of you, all of the ladies, remember you complete me. Did you know that's not true? Let me explain.
There's not a human being on the face of the earth that can complete you. That's not how God designed us.
If you are not listen, two half people will not make a whole person.
Two unhealthy people will not make a healthy marriage.
Two half people that are not fully healthy emotionally and spiritually and physically can't go in. Because what happens is when you look for another person to complete you, it's called there's a term for it called codependency. And it gets worse. That doesn't get better.
You're looking at them for the source of your emotional health. You're looking to them to make you happy physically. You're looking at them to take the lead spiritually. And it's a weight too heavy for most people to bear.
So I'm suggesting we have to own I got to own myself.
Romans twelve. Each one of us will give account of themselves before God. I'm responsible to God for me. Now, that doesn't mean I have responsibility for other people in my life. Certainly I do. But my primary fundamental responsibility before God is to me, my health, how I navigate through life, how I deal with things. And a healthy you is going to make a healthy y'all as you get healthier, you're going to bring so much more into your marriage. So the first thing you need to do, instead of trying to change them to kind of fit you, you have to ask the hard question how healthy am I?
Am I trying to fix what's wrong with me by looking to them? What's interesting about it, when God puts people together, he puts people in your life. He puts them there for a reason, for a purpose.
When God created things remember I said I like the Genesis account of creation? I believe that when god created. You read the first couple of chapters. Everything he created, God looked at it and said, that's good, that's good, that's good. Six times he created man.
And for the first time, he said, that's not good.
That's not good. And then he went on to say, this guy needs a companion.
He needs a partner, he needs a helper.
He needs someone to do life with, and together they'll be better and they'll be stronger. So God placed Adam with Eve. He placed a man with a woman. Now, what's interesting, when you read Genesis 127, god created mankind in his own image. We call that the Amago Day, the image of God in the image of God, the Amago Day. He created them. Listen, male and female, god created them. Now, here's what the Bible teaches about men and women. We were created by God to be equal with each other, but to be different. We're different. A man is superior to a woman at being a man, and a woman is superior to a man at being a woman. It doesn't diminish either of us. It means God designed us in such a way that you fulfill areas of me that might need help in. If you hire people, one of the biggest mistakes you could make is hiring everybody just like you.
If everybody thinks like you, if everybody sees the situation exactly like you, you're going to have blind spots in your organization. You need to hire people that don't compete with you, but that contrast you, because ultimately, guess what? They'll complement you. That's the same thing in a relationship.
When you're looking for someone, you don't want someone that will compete with you or someone who really will always what's the word I'm looking for? Will just make life miserable for you. You want someone that complements you. And so God puts people together equal but different.
Blue and pink are equal in the fact that they're colors on the color spectrum, but they're different.
Hot water and cold water are equal in the fact that they're water, but they're different.
So when God puts men and women together, he does so understanding that they're equal, but they're very different and they're very distinctive. Now, this is an interesting study, and some studies will agree and some will disagree. But if you Google this, you'll see a lot on it.
There's information about women being more right brain dominant. Have you heard that? Men being more left brain dominant? And there's a lot of science and thinking behind that. Psychologists, sociologists. It's not a Christian study at all, but it's interesting because it goes back to how God wired us. They say women tend to be right brain dominant, which means women tend to be more emotional than men.
I ain't looking at nobody when I look out there now, I'm looking right at your foreheads. I ain't looking at anybody.
They tend to be a little more emotional, spontaneous. Women tend to be more relational. That's true. I've seen that women tend to cindy always could pick up if our relationship needed tweaking she saw it before me. I've talked to a lot of couples usually just do the preliminary to determine what type of counseling they need to go to or be in. But most of the time, women recognize a relationship in trouble before a man. It's just how it is. I can't tell you the number of couples I've talked to through the years who have said he didn't listen to me until the Samsonites were at the front door. Now Samsonites are suitcases.
And when that happened, he looks back at her and says to her, do we have a problem?
And she tried not to lose her mind. Says, I've been telling you we've had a problem four months. Well, women are wired that way. And a wise man will listen because God has wired her in a way to be more intuitively and instinctively aware of the health of your relationship. More so than you not only get too far ahead of myself, but before I forget this, can I tell you one of the things that happen in a relationship is we wait. Instead of dealing with issues when the woman identifies an area, sometimes we men. We got the next thing to do. And so we say, hey, wait. I know this is important, but just wait. We'll deal with it. I need you to wait. And here's the problem. The W-A-I-T-S can become W-E-I-G-H-T-S if left untouched.
And the more you say weight, the heavier it gets. The more you say weight. Five pounds become 1010 becomes 15. And before long, she's straining under the load of your weights because she's telling you, I'm in tune with this. This isn't right. And finally, what happens is the weights just drop.
Now, no one in the house can see when the weights are being piled on because you're good with that. You can carry it. But everyone in the house sees it. When the weights get dropped, they hear it and they know it.
So I'm just saying you can't put off. So, fellas, don't take it personally when your wife identifies some areas of relationships. You need help. Don't be defensive. Sometimes early on in our marriage, when Cindy will point out, I'm going, you know how I'm working and how much I'm doing. What all this stuff going on? Now you're pointing this out. And I had to realize she's in tune with something that I'm not in tune with. I need to listen to this girl. She's trying to help me.
Believe me, I'm married way over my head.
And so I'm thinking I better finally listen to her. But my point is, my knee jerk was to be defensive. So I get it when men are defensive. I don't need counseling. I don't need it now. We don't have that attitude. If our car breaks down, I need a mechanic, or we need legal help, I need a lawyer or we're sick, I need a doctor. But it's something about counseling. I ain't going no counselor. Really?
Maybe you ought to just challenge your thinking on that sport and go ahead and swallow your pride, because she might be identifying something that you need to be a healthier you, because God wired her that way. It's called right brain dominant. Now, men tend to be more left brain dominant. What's that mean? More analytical, more explicit, more goal oriented. And most women would agree with that. Now, where that runs most women crazy is when you bring a problem to your husband and he gives you three things you can do to fix that problem, and you're like, I know how to fix this. I didn't need you to tell me. I just needed to process. And men does. We don't understand those words that are coming out of your mouth when you say that, because we really think our job is to help you fix the problem. And a lot of times you don't need help. You already know the answer. You just want to process. With us, men are looking for information. Women are looking for interaction. It's two very different things, but they can coalesce and they can help us both.
So it's just trying to help us understand how we misunderstand one another. That's why the Bible says, listen, one Peter three seven, live with a lie. Live with your wife according to knowledge. It's interesting. There's not a verse in the Bible that says to the women, live with your husbands according to knowledge. But it does say to the men, live with your why? Because most men need help to know how to live successfully with a woman. We don't know how to do that. Can we be honest? Women we don't know. We don't know. So we have to learn. That's why two men wrote two great books after talking to several great women about how to do this. One of them is Willard Harley. This is a good reference for you. It's called His Needs, Her Needs, and he talks about identifying the basic needs of a woman. And it would do you really good to Google that one and go to Amazon and buy that one if you're not familiar. There's another good book by Gary Smalley called Five Love Languages. And it's understanding the language that your wife or husband speaks and realizing that what you're trying to do to touch them in some meaningful way may not be the gift that they're wanting to receive. Sometimes they need your words, and sometimes they need your touch. And sometimes they love gifts, and sometimes they love surprises. There's different things. You have to learn their love language. I don't know about you. I had this experience a lot with Cindy where I'd say something and she'd look at me and go, oh, that was sweet. And I'm like, all right. What did I just say?
What was sweet about that? I need to know. I want to make a note. Or she'd go, oh, that was so romantic. And I'm like, really?
That was romantic? Yes, you can do it. You know how to do these things. But I'm just saying, fellas, make notes.
When she recognizes something, you do write that down because she's telling you, this is my love language. This is what speaks to my soul. This is what touches my heart. Now, one of the things, girls, that men respond to is praise. Men love to be bragged on. Try this on him next time. You ever notice when he's carrying the trash to the curb, he's walking down there, he's put it in the barrel, and you look out the front door and go, whoo, baby, are you working out?
Let me tell you what we men will do. We will look for heavy stuff to take to the curb.
We will baby, I can look back at his car.
We respond to that. We respond to that. So that's a love language that we have is men like to be honey, you do that so well. Thank you, baby. Do that for you. You know that. And then you just kind of behind his back, oh, it worked. I got it right. So we talk different languages. We're equal, but we're very different in how we relate, and it's important that we understand that. Listen to this verse, genesis 224. Therefore will a man leave his father and mother, and in leaving the father and mother, he will be joined to his wife, and they two become one flesh. I put this in your notes. There is a leaving and a cleaving and a weaving of two lives together. And it's not automatic.
It takes time to develop a good relationship.
It takes time to have a good partnership. It takes time to have a good marriage. And I've identified quickly three principles from God's word that will help you be more effective. And I wanted just to give them to you before we go. Principle number one is recognize the value of companionship.
Companionship.
Remember when God said, I'm going to give him something he needs? He said, I'm going to give him a helper. I'm going to give him a companion. I'm going to give him someone and give her someone that can do life. They can do life together. Listen to proverbs 1822 Proverbs 822 says, a man who finds a wife finds a good thing. Let me read that to you a different way. Proverbs 822 a woman who finds a husband finds a good thing. Let me explain this. Not every man will make a good husband.
Not every woman will make a good wife.
There are certain qualities that you should look for in a person. Yes. You're going to be attracted to them. Yes, that's an initial quality. There's something about them that's attractive. But I've told you before, they may be hot, but hell is hot, and you don't want to go there either.
So there's got to be more than hot. You got to get past hot, really, because you're trying to look for something else. You're trying to look for the quality of a person that you actually could spend time with this person, you could do life with them. And part of doing life with them is recognizing that they're a companion to you. It involves camaraderie. Listen. Ecclesiastes nine nine. Enjoy life with your husband or wife that you love all the days of your life. Did you hear the wording of that? Enjoy that. You want to be with someone you enjoy being with. You want to be with someone you would rather be with than any other one on the Earth. You want to be with that person. Camaraderie. It involves communion.
Can you know what communion is? When I use that in context of a relationship, I'm talking about intimacy.
You know what intimacy is? Intimacy is into me. I see intimacy. It means you can look into someone's heart. You know them into me. I see. You want to find somebody that can look into you, that knows you. Cindy and I were married long enough that if you told me something she said, I could tell you just based on what you said, whether she would have said it.
You could tell me how she said it, and knowing her as well as I could tell you whether or not she would have said what you said she said the way she said it, because I knew her.
When you're in a relationship with someone, that's how that works. You ladies could defend him by saying, he'd never say that. No, he'd do that, but he wouldn't say that. Why don't you know him? There's a beautiful psalm that God says I will guide them with my eye. When you're in a communion, you're in intimacy. You're in a relationship. They can guide you with an eye. Let me tell you what it looks like another personal story, because I know me better than anybody.
Hey, fellows. Have you ever been where I was sitting there at dinner with your wife and some other couples and suddenly you feel inspired to share a story about something funny she did the week before that? You didn't clear the story with her before you shared it.
Has that happened to anybody? Just me sitting there at dinner, two or three other couples and all of a sudden I think about this funny thing Cindy did. And I'm right in the middle of my story, man, it was so funny. And all of a sudden, our eyes meet, and she guides me with her eye.
And what she said in her eye was simply this abort the mission.
Return to base self destruct if need be. And you know, right before you're at the really funny part that she did, you go, oh, and I don't remember how it ended, but I am really a stupid man. I'm just a really a stupid man. I don't know why it comes out of my mouth. Well, what happened to her? Well, you know her. She that was you. She didn't have to say a word. She looked at you and that look, she guided you with her eye. She moved you around with her eyes. That's intimacy.
And when you're in a relationship and you have a companion and you are with some into me, they see you can see within that person. You know their heart and you know how they think. And when you've done that, you've achieved a level of intimacy that's wonderful in a relationship.
And then they're a coworker. They're a comrade, they're communion, they're a coworker. Proverbs 217 talks about your spouse as a partner.
Song of Solomon 516 refers to your spouse as your friend. Listen to ecclesiastes four nine. Two are better than one because they have a good return for their work. If one of them falls down, the other can help them up.
I told you before, Cindy made me better. In every area of my life, she made me better.
She made me better as a pastor, a communicator early on. And I'd always ask her, she was my number one counselor, and she gave me good critique. And I'd always ask her, how do you think the message went? Nobody walked out. So I guess that's a win. I'm processing. I finished before they did. That was a win. Well, just soon as I said that well, anyway, somebody had to leave there right in the middle of that. I'm sorry, it's funny, my ADHD just kicked in.
But all of a sudden you're asking her, what do you think I did? Here's what she said. It really helped me, help me a lot. She said, you know what? You give great information. You really do.
You share facts, you study well, I know you've prepared. But she said, I don't always feel anything when you talk, I don't feel anything. And she said, speaking from a woman's perspective, tell us about your family. Tell us about your kids. Tell me something about your good dad. You're a good husband. She said, I want to know that about I want to know when I hear you speak, relate to something as a woman that I can connect with you other than facts. Other than facts. I'm saying that help me. I don't know how effective I am at doing that, but I'm just saying anything you hear, if I connect with any of you women, just look up at the sky and say, thanks, Cindy. Because that's something that she helped me with. What's my point? My point is, God has put someone in your life to make you a better you, to help you, to help. You grow and to help you develop. So there's companionship. Second word in hurriedly communication.
Communication. One of the biggest challenges, guys, that every couple faces is conflict resolution. How do you work through it? I talked about the difference between weight and weights. And in conflict resolution, you have to find a way to get to a point where you can both be mutually satisfied with the outcome.
Heard about a woman that went to a marriage counselor without her husband, and when she got there, the marriage counselor said, well, so you didn't bring your husband. She said, well, if I brought him, we'd only end up fighting.
You get that on the way home.
That was funny, actually. I thought that was funny, but I don't. Maybe not, but the point is that if you can't resolve conflicts with each other, if you can't work through that, you're not going to grow very far in your relationship.
But let me give this again. First of all, find the right time. Find the right time. Not every time to resolve a conflict is the best time. Not when you're at dinner with friends or you're in the car in one of those awkward moments around the kids. That's not the right time. Find the right time. Number two, pick the right tone. Pick the right tone.
You're trying to bring the level of frustration. If you have to say, I'm too upset right now, I can't even talk about this. I'm going to say something that I might mean in the moment, but I need to chill a little bit before we talk about it. So you know you better than you.
So find the right time, find the right tone, find the right turf. The right turf. Find the right place to talk about this problem and then find the right topic. What do I mean by that? Attack the problem, not the person.
So many times, man, it goes south and nothing gets resolved because it becomes, well, you always and you're like this and you're like your mother, you're like your dad and boy, you're attacking each other when that's not the problem. The problem is the thing that has brought the conflict. It's not personal. It became personal.
So fight the tendency for the problems that are created in your relationship to become personal. Stay on the problem. Don't attack the person. That involves good communication.
I encourage you in the area of time management when it comes to communication.
Make sure that you are spending the time, the quality of time, the quantity of time you need to be a healthier you. Everybody needs a sabbatical. You need some time during every day. You need some time during every week, you need some time during every month, you need some time during every year. And you ought to talk to your spouse about what that looks like. It's different for different people I'm talking to. Some of you guys have crazy busy lives so your sabbaticals may look differently than other people's. So I'm just saying, do what works for you, but find a happy medium where you can manage your time well, where you're spending time with the people who truly love you most. Because here's what happens if you're not careful. You'll spend more of your time with the people who love you the least than you do with the people who love you the most.
We talk about this a lot. People say, oh, I got a lot of friends. When you see Facebook, I have 800 friends. I've told you before. No, you don't.
You got 800 connections, but you don't have 800 friends. Are you kidding me?
You got 800 people that will come into your life when every other friend has walked out. Really?
You have 800 people that will let you share your heart without crossing their eyes or disconnecting the really?
You have 800 people you could confide in and trust what you're telling them without any fear of them sharing that with everyone else. Really? No.
When you think about it, you'll have a lot of acquaintances. You'll have a lot of acquaintances. Business partner, yeah, you have thousands of those, hundreds of those. But you really only have a few friends, and you need safe people in your life.
You need them as a wife, you need them as a husband. You need safe people in your life, people that let you have a bad day without turning around and ratting you out about, oh, you won't believe what he just said. You need to have people in your life that will let you say something that you may not even mean in the moment. Or maybe you meant it in the moment, but it's not really something that you would defend. You just needed to say it, and they're okay with you saying it. And you got to work to develop those. I use the card thing a moment ago. Talk about a deck of cards. I mean, you got a joker in there. You only have four aces. Well, that's biblical, but it's really, honestly, an illustration. You only have four aces.
You can go through a life, and when you find the ace, when you find that person, you can count on hang on to them. Chances are the person you're the closest to this morning was at one time a stranger to you. That's why in Proverbs 17, he says, hey, if a person would have friends, not everybody will, but if you would have friends, you have to, first of all, show yourself to be friendly.
There's a locked in law of likeness in the Bible that says whatever you want, you give away.
You want friendship, you be a friend, you're going to get burned in the process. Jesus had twelve and one of them burned him, so you're going to get burned in the process.
But the return is so worth the investment of your time. Because what might happen in the interaction is you may develop a lifelong friend that will be there for you and be there with you, and that will help you through the hardest times of your life. There's nothing like great friends.
You need them. Your spouse should be one of them and premier above all of them. So you're looking for that level of friendship. Here's the last one, and we'll go. It involves companionship, communication, and here's the third one commitment, commitment, commitment.
Can I tell you this? Love will not keep you together.
I don't care what Captain Tenille said.
It will not keep you together.
That's beautiful. It's wonderful. It'll attract you. It's a great thing, but it won't keep you together. You know what'll keep you together? Commitment.
Commitment. Love will go in and out of a relationship. It will get stronger and weaker from time to time. But if you decide, by the grace of God, we're going to make this thing work, the love can come back into that relationship.
You can restore a relationship.
You can begin again. You know what I would suggest that you do? Start at the beginning.
Start dating that girl again. Start dating that boy again.
Just start there and let it be. That a date, guys. A date. That's it initially a date.
Just go out, spend time with him, get to know him all over again. Start there. And then from there, you may find the things that attracted you to one another are really still there. I sat in the living room of a young couple, and they were struggling in their relationship so bad. He sat across the room, she sat on the sofa. And I'm just listening to them kind of go back and forth at each other. And I noticed on the coffee table their wedding pictures and an album. I said, hey, what's that? Oh, it's their weding pictures. Let's look at those. That's awesome. So I just kind of changed the subject. Picked up their wedding album, sat down. Hey, man, come over here and look at this. And so she scooted over, he sat down, so put it in her lap. And so they went through them picture by picture. And before you know it, they're smiling. Before you know it, they're laughing. Before you know it, they're crying because they're recognizing and they're realizing that what they had, they had lost. But it was still there. It was still there.
It had been dormant. It had been under the surface. Both of them had almost given up that it could ever come back. But they were kind of rekindling some embers, you know what I mean? Just rekindling a little bit of spark in a flame.
And so I said, Guys, you ought to just why don't you go out this week? Just go on a date this week. And they ended up I heard later on that they ended up really kind of starting down that path. They got some good counseling, and they've made it work. I don't know that that works for everybody. I don't know that would work for you. But it's worth a shot. It's worth a shot.
And I can tell you, man, if it does work, you'll be so fulfilled. God can do so many amazing things through your life, and there's no one that will love you and be there more for you than that person who's committed to do that journey of life with you. And can I tell you, it's the second closing, so, you know, I'm really done now.
I can tell you when that vow says for better or worse, that's what it means. And can I tell you when it says, in sickness and in health, that's what it means.
When I walked through that journey with Cindy's health in the last days of her life on this Earth, never. I never thought about it. I couldn't imagine being anywhere else.
I told him at the church, I don't know what it's going to look like. I hope people are there when I get back, but my priority isn't there. My priority is with her.
She went into that neurological intensive care unit at Zale Ipsy, and she didn't go out for 21 days until she stepped into the presence of the Lord.
As I stand before You, I'm so proud that I never left her side.
Not much I could do but get in the way.
Kids were there and we did everything we could and prayed for her and tried to be there for her.
I never thought about the vows that I took when I was a 17 year old kid.
To have and to hold from this day forth, for better and for worse, in sickness and health, until God by death shall separate us.
I've done a lot of stupid things in my life, but that was the best thing that I've ever done.
I kept my word. I walked the line. And I stand before you this morning to tell you I'm so glad I did. You will be too. Hang in there, man. Better days ahead. Let's pray.
Lord, thank you for your word.
Thank you for the value of great relationships.
Thank you for people in our life that really love us, that love us enough to walk through the deepest valleys that we go through, to climb the highest heights.
Thank you that they're with us in success and failure. They're with us in gains and in losses.
They never change. They're there.
And Lord, I pray you'll, strengthen every relationship in this room and the thousands that may be watching and will watch online help us to see the value of that, the health of that.
And Lord, I pray if there's anyone in the room or anyone watching who may never trusted you as Savior, that this might be that moment when they humble their heart. They simply pray, Lord, with all that I know about me, I now trust all that I know about you come into my heart.
Forgive my sin. I pray this in Jesus name. Amen.
[00:39:07] Speaker A: Thank you so much for tuning in today. If you have any questions or prayer requests, please contact us by visiting metchurch.com so that we can follow up with you this week. We look forward to seeing you next week.
